Fabulously Grown Up
Hello Lovahs!
BCBG Pumps, Dior Extreme Gladiators, Forever 21 Mary Janes, Aldo Booties
There's something about 'growing up' that is not only scary, but also freakishly reassuring. To see that we've made it this far, unscathed, unharmed – mostly! – and still managing our lives somehow, it gives you the sense that yes, we can make it, we can do it, not matter what life throws our way.
When we're in our teens and early twenties, we're told that if we don't achieve near perfection in school, we will get no dashing career – yet, if we find an amazing husband and marry young and rich, well, we've done alright for ourselves regardless. I chose neither of these paths, and I don't think too many of us do, not to put anyone down or anything.
Everyone chooses their own paths in life, but what we learn as we get older, is that there is no one right path. What may work for one, will definitely not work for another. We each have our own needs, wants, fears and aspirations, and we worry if we don't live up to the expectations of our parents, our friends, and even ourselves, we won't get to where we want.
Then one day, you wake up, and realise that you're doing okay. No matter where you've failed in life, or what you have accomplished, even if it's not the life you expected or dreamed of, you discover you're happy. You've made it, in your own way, you've done it.
At whatever age this happens, for me, it's 25, you discover that you're satisfied. Sure there's still things you want to do, things you want to buy and see, that will never stop, that's life. You realise you've grown up alright, you've done okay by YOU. No more second opinions, no more pondering your level of success in the game we call life – you've grown up okay, by your own standards.
We are all our own biggest critics, we may care what relatives, boyfriends, and friends think of us, but there are times where nothing matters but our own opinion of ourselves. And if you can manage to make yourself happy, to your own set of standards, then that's all that really matters.
xoxo
Fab Brunette
25 Responses to “Fabulously Grown Up”
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Fab Brunette loves cupcakes and Paris, high heels and pearls. Dreams of travel, cooks in Manolos, and writes with her heart.
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loved this post – i so agree with so much you said. Getting older can be kinda great.
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Love The forever 21 mary janes!!
x
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Great post! Your words made me so happy, especially as someone who hasn’t really chosen the stereotypical path you described
I cannot imagine it any other way!
This is my favorite part:
“Then one day, you wake up, and realize that you’re doing okay. No matter where you’ve failed in life, or what you have accomplished, even if it’s not the life you expected or dreamed of, you discover you’re happy. You’ve made it, in your own way, you’ve done it.”
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Thanks darling, I’m glad you like it
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Well said!
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I agree that just because one may not be standard in the way they live life or make decisions, does not make them below standard.
Smooches,
Sassy Chica
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Thanks Sassy!
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Love love love the booties!
I also love love love this post, and it’s so true! I spent so long feeling crappy about not measuring up to what my parents wanted me to be (My mom had the audacity to compare me to my best friend once!), but one day, something just snapped within me. I realized that I wasn’t in a terrible position. I may not be taking that traditional “four years straight through” college road, but you know? I’m living life, I love my life, I’m happy, and I can’t allow people to make me feel like I’m doing wrong because it’s not what they would have done.
This post is sooooo true and definitely applies to what I’ve been going through the past few years.
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I think many of us gave been there, thanks for your comment!
Sent from my iPhone
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And this is why you’re one FAB brunette!
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I agree with Ali, very very FAB. A beautiful post – though I don’t feel I’ve gotten to this point yet, it’s amazing when you realize that it’s up to you to approve of yourself and make yourself happy and realize you’re greatness. Thanks for the reminder
and sorry about the tag, haha.
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This is such a positive post, I’m not that happy with my life yet but I’m surely hoping that in a few years i can say things like you do here
so inspiring.
ps. that dior shoes are to die for!:)
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Thanks darling, it doesn’t happen quick. I went through years of feeling
inadequate, never feeling satisfied, always worried about the future, but it
will happen for you too!
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I’m right with you at 25. But I bet we hit more milestones just like it…
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Such an uplifting post…I hope to feel this way when I am 25. I think I am slowly getting there!
Gorgeous shoes!
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You’ll make it… are you leaning towards SF or UK ?
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Oh totally, we will hit so many milestones and think, jesus christ we’re
freaking old.
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Cheers to that! You reminded me of this quote I like: There are hundreds of paths up the mountain, all leading in the same direction, so it doesnt matter which path you take. The only one wasting time is the one who runs around and around the mountain, telling everyone else that their path is wrong. ~Hindu teaching
By the way, love the shoes!
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“…yet, if we find an amazing husband and marry young and rich, well, we’ve done alright for ourselves regardless.”
Ummm…where did you grow up, 1969? Nobody ever told me it was OK to depend on a man.
Anyway, you are completely right, there are many paths to happiness and success, and not all of them are straight and well-defined. While I still dream of a more meaningful career, I too can say that I am happy with my adult self. I have worked hard and made a good life for myself. It is really nice to know that.
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That’s not what I personally believe, but you see it a lot in the suburbs -
girls who are 19, 20, 21 getting married, having kids and staying at home -
there’s nothing wrong with that at all, but people seem to think that’s a
better route than what I’ve taken – baby at 22, not married, and still being
adventerous, moving around and not having a ‘proper job’. I have to face
people like this everyday who ask me when I’m getting married, when am I
moving into a proper house (apparently a condo isn’t proper living space for
a toddler), and then this girl I know who has two kids, is 20, left high
school at 16 but she’s married to a guy who works at an auto plant – and
SHE’s doing alright by their standards, better than I am. I just shake my
head at it but in their minds she has done alright for herself, whereas I
haven’t. It’s stupid.
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>>I have worked hard and made a good life for myself. It is really nice to know that.
you are right. but, i live in divorce and my husband must pay for me. he earns a lot of money – and this is also my meritorious. so i quit my freelance-activities and decided to live only with this/his money.
now i get a job offer from my old employer. i think about it. nevertheless i feel not bad with the opportunity doing the stuff i only want.
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I certainly don’t discredit the valuable stay-at-home wives/moms…hell, I wouldn’t mind having one myself.
It’s the idea of being dependent on someone else financially and not having options thing that gets me…
I deal with those type of questions too….When are you getting married? When are you having babies? People don’t even realize what they’re doing when they ask you these things. You shouldn’t let them get to you. You have a smart, beautiful, healthy little girl, a stable place to live and a bright future in the cupcake industry…you are doing well by anyone’s standards. I find that a lot of times, the people critiquing someone else’s lifestyle are simply jealous.
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Thanks for the kind words!
Sent from my iPhone
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[...] Being Fabulously Grown Up [...]
thank you for reminding me that yes, we all can grow up alright no matter how ugly things can be, we went through it eventually and live our own life
loving this post! ♥
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